|Sweethearts, Hello From Hollywood - Roy Trumbull|
The first one of these "reports" was an accident. Now there's two years worth. Seems my two year stint in Hollywood many years ago exposed me to enough outrageous frauds that writing these pieces is second nature. Our reporter still lacks a name. I'm open to suggestions.
Keywords: Hollywood; movies; actors; nut cases; satire; humor
|Joey and the P-Ball - Roy Trumbull|
A teenager invents a golf ball that can't be lost.
Keywords: golf; fantasy; children's stories; audio books; teenagers; Roy Trumbull
|Ten New Dresses CLEAN! - Roy Trumbull|
Ten New Dresses CLEAN! A twisted joke at the expense of the fat wife of a radio station GM goes wrong.
Keywords: radio; fat women; armpit sweat; womens page
|Dunderberg - Roy Trumbull|
This is the story of the imps, goblins, and other demons who live atop Thunder Mountain and raise squalls on the waters below. This story comes from the collection "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner.
Keywords: Dunderberg; Thunder Mountain; demons; squalls; storms; sailors; ships; folklore
|Joey and Young Mr. Tom by Roy Trumbull copyright 2009 - Roy Trumbull|
Joey falls asleep and finds himself on a rail car in 1862 with a young Thomas Edison while the Civil War rages. Because Detroit is adjacent to Canada it was a major station on the Underground Railroad and the crossing point for fugitive slaves. I added mention in the story of the Unitarian minister Thomas Starr King. He was responsible for keeping California from supporting the confederates. For 22 years I worked one block away from his crypt at his church...
Keywords: Joey; Edison; adventure; fiction; historical; Civil War; slavery; Starr King; underground railroad
|The Culprit Fay - Roy Trumbull|
A story from the collection "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner. A fay is one of the many names for a fairy. In this story a fay has loved a mortal and the fairy king sends him on a quest in which he must catch a drop of spray from a leaping sturgeon and a spark from a meteor.
Keywords: fay; fairy; Hudson; watersprites; ghosts
|The Crapshooters by Carl Sandburg - Roy Trumbull|
To gamblers it is all about the game even in the hereafter.
Keywords: Carl Sandburg; Crapshooters; gambling
|Ask Your Doctor About Foolium - Roy Trumbull|
I wrote this after seeing one too many ads aimed directly at the rubes to get them to request script for expensive meds.
Keywords: drugs; medicine; health care; humor; Roy Trumbull
|Miss Moose Meat - Roy Trumbull|
copyright 2008 by Roy Trumbull A young lady is proud of the fact she was named Miss Moose Meat at a beauty contest in Alaska. In fact she never fails to mention the fact, much to the chagrin of her brother. It acts as a boy friend screening process. If a guy is still interested after he hears the tale, then maybe he's the one.
Keywords: Alaska; moose; satire; love; beauty contest; love; college; Roy Trumbull
|The Catskill Witch - Roy Trumbull|
A story from the collection "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner. A witch sits atop a monster turned to stone and brews the weather.
Keywords: witch; Catskills; weather; Indians; myths; legends
|Boy And Father by Carl Sandburg - Roy Trumbull|
To the boy Alexander, it is dreams from his reading and wonder about his lost mother as the rain comes down.
Keywords: Carl Sandburg; Boy and Father; dreams; adventure; mother; poetry
|The Youth and His Eagle - a Zuni tale - Roy Trumbull|
An Indian youth dotes on his pet eagle. He is transported to another realm and there becomes an eagle himself. Then he is tempted to fly to a forbidden place and is seduced by the spirits of the dead.
Keywords: audio books; Indian; Zuni; eagle; spirits; evil
|Ecclesiastes - Roy Trumbull|
Vanity of vanities all is vanity. Frustration of frustrations all is frustration. The Hebrew text can be translated either way. We are meant to think Solomon was the author but the intrusion of non Hebrew words into the text place it in the Greek period about 245 BCE. The philosophy expressed is also very Greek. The Hebrew name of this book is Koheleth. The meaning is uncertain but it might be a person such as the master of an academy...
Keywords: audio book; bible; Koheleth; Ecclesiastes; Solomon; Greek; Epicurean philosophy
|Un Morso Du Pang by Edna Ferber - Roy Trumbull|
The place is the midwest. The time is the early days of World War I. The young men are enlisting and their girl friends are left behind. Tessie Golden works in a watch factory and is sassy and confident. But when her boy friend comes home during a break in training she finds he is learning French. It dawns on her that when he comes home from the war he will be a diferent person but she will be the same...
Keywords: audio books; fiction; ferber; hen lit; love; romance
|The Weather Forecast for 2056 - Roy Trumbull|
This forecast is based upon existing trends and the certainty that lobbyists will keep anything useful from ever coming out of Washington, D.C..
Keywords: weather; global warming; humor; Roy Trumbull
|President Grant by Henry Adams - Roy Trumbull|
This is a reading of chapter 17 of "The Education of Henry Adams" It sets the political scene for the period of the Grant Administration and gives you a look at a Congress that didn't work then just as it doesn't work now. I will admit that Adams is an acquired taste. His conceit of life circumstances providing his education wears a bit. But give your ears the benefit of the doubt and stay with it...
Keywords: audio book; President Grant; Henry Adams; The Education of Henry Adams
|Of Time And Texas by William F. Nolan - Roy Trumbull|
A professor invents a time door with which to solve the over population problem in the year 2057 There was plenty of room in Texas in 1957. There is a slight glitch. The text for this story may be found at www.gutenberg.org .
Keywords: time travel; sci-fi; Nolan; audio book; fiction; classic sci-fi; humor
|Notes On The Bible - Roy Trumbull|
These are some notes on the differences between the Jewish bible and the Christian "Old Testament". The order of the books is different. The names of the books are different. The leading names within the stories are different. The translation problems are considerable. What the bible says or may not say remains problematic.
Keywords: bible; Christian; Jewish; translation; Roy Trumbull
|Why Spuyten Duyvil Is So Named - Roy Trumbull|
The tale of the New Amsterdam trumpeter sent to warn of a British invasion who can't find a ferryman. He vows to cross the water in spite of the devil. The devil takes him on and he gets out one final blast before he drowns. This story comes from "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner.
Keywords: New Amsterdam; devil; British; trumpeter; Anthony Van Corlaer; Spuyten Duyvil
|Jack and the Bad Stock by Roy Trumbull - Roy Trumbull|
A twisted fairy tale that introduces one to the fictions of Wall Street and the legal fictions that make them possible.
Keywords: humor; Jack and the beanstock; legal fictions; Wall Street; crooks in Congress; Roy Trumbull; offshore headquarters; investment fraud
|Unborn Tomorrow by Mack Reynolds - Roy Trumbull|
A client with money hires a detective to bring him a time traveler so he can learn the secrets of the future and put off his own death. This leads to a trip to Octoberfest and a triple hangover.
Keywords: Sci-Fi; Mack Reynolds; Octoberfest; time travel; hangover
|Old Rambling House by Frank Herbert - Roy Trumbull|
If you lived in a trailer would you trade it for a spacious house with all the modern conveniences? Would it matter if it was in another galaxy?
Keywords: aliens; CPA; Frank Herbert; Sci-Fi; tax collection
|The Phonograph and the Graft by O.Henry - Roy Trumbull|
Two grifters decide to introduce the phonograph to South America. They meet the assistant to the President whose graft is that of being the only honest man in the country. They become involved in his attempt to put down a revolution before it starts. The story contains racial slurs of which I've removed the most objectionable. I don't know whether it is worse to leave in the remainder or to join the collective amnesia that tries to pretend such language couldn't be heard on every street corner...
Keywords: phonograph; O.Henry; South America; humor; audio book
|In The Name of Friendship by Frank Bird Linderman - Roy Trumbull|
A man is bent on suicide. As there are biblical restrictions to taking your own life, the local bartender offers to kill him as a matter of friendship. As he cocks the trigger of his Colt-45 he explains the hole will be big enough for a cat to jump through and not touch meat.
Keywords: old west; Linderman; suicide; black humor; Missouri,Colt-45,murder
|The Loss of New York by George M. Wrong - Roy Trumbull|
This is chapter 4 from the book "Washington and His Comrades in Arms, A Chronicle of the War of Independence" by George M. Wrong It covers a stunning turning point in the fortunes of war. The British had mounted a massive campaign against the rebels and good reports of it kept flowing to London. Then General Washington managed a series of clever and bold maneuvers that caused the British to pull back and take him seriously...
Keywords: audio books; George Washington; New York City; American History; Revolutionary War
|Solandar's Radio Tomb by Ellis Parker Butler - Roy Trumbull|
This story was first published in 1927 in Amazing Stories at a time when the new technology was radio. It tells a cautious tale about the perils of the future. A millionaire has a granite tomb built with loudspeakers to broadcast the sound of his radio station. If your grandfather doesn't get computers, nonetheless it's your turn to play the fool and ask him what A and B batteries were.
Keywords: Sci-Fi; radio; cemeteries; wills; death; tombs
|The Last Shot At Germantown - Roy Trumbull|
Future events at wartime are oft foretold by dreams and wondrous signs. This is a collection of such stories which ends with the Revolutionary War battle of Germantown. The story comes from Myths and Legends of Our Own Land by Charles M. Skinner.
Keywords: Germantown; Revolutionary Way; dreams; wondrous signs
|The Last Revel At Printz Hall - Roy Trumbull|
A fiddler teases the owner of a haunted mansion in front of witnesses. The man offers him the job as caretaker. Not wishing to lose face the fiddler accepts. The Printz Hall of the story was near the present day Chester, PA. The story is from Myths and Legends of Our Own Land by Charles M. Skinner.
Keywords: Printz Hall; haunted; caretaker; fiddler; Chester PA; ghosts
|The Altar At Midnight by C.M. Kornbluth - Roy Trumbull|
Two men in a bar. One is a spacer with a face full of red lines from compression and decompression. The other is a man known as Doc. It turns out he is responsible for space travel.
Keywords: Sci-Fi; Kornbluth; audio books; space travel; bars; drinking; Bowman Drive
|Fables In Slang by George Ade - Roy Trumbull|
George Ade was a newspaper man from Indiana who made his mark in Chicago writing about the common man. His "Fables In Slang" elevated him above the fate of scribes (news reporters) and into the rarified atmosphere of syndication. The Fable of Why Sweetie Flew the Track The Fable of Why Essie's Tall Friend Got the Fresh Air The Fable of the Michigan Counterfeit Who Wasn't One Thing or the Other The Fable of the Corporation Director and the Mislaid Ambition
Keywords: audio books; humor; satire; George Ade; Fables In Slang
|Droozle by Frank Banta - Roy Trumbull|
You know the story of the man, the woman, and the snake? Well, it's not that one. This snake serves as a ballpoint pen and has literary ambitions. The text for this story is at www.gutenberg.org
Keywords: sci-fi; fantasy; Frank Banta; audio book; snake; ballpoint; whimsy
|The Old Lodger - Roy Trumbull|
This tale, from Myths and Legends of Our Own Land by Charles M. Skinner, tells of a non believing landlady who encounters her dead lodger.
Keywords: superstition; ghosts; afterlife; Detroit
|Baker's Dozen - Roy Trumbull|
From the collection "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner comes this tale of the origins of the baker's dozen.
Keywords: baker's dozen; myths; legends; New Amsterdam; bewitched; 13
|Fellow-Citizens by Carl Sandburg - Roy Trumbull|
A rather wry look at how to measures happiness.
Keywords: Carl Sandburg; Millionaire; Publisher; Mayor; Instrument Maker; happiness; Music
|The Plot To Assassinate The President-Elect - Roy Trumbull|
This account of a plot in Baltimore to assassinate Lincoln before he could take the oath of office comes from Carl Sandburg's "Lincoln-The War Years".
Keywords: Lincoln; Sandburg; assassination; Baltimore; Civil War; slavery; abolition
|The Golem of Worms - Roy Trumbull|
This is a Jewish folk tale dating to the 16th century. In a time of great trouble for the Jews a supernatural being is created to protect them. The text for this story is at http://www.pitt.edu/~dash/golem.html#golem .
Keywords: golem; Jews; supernatural
|Storm Ship On The Hudson - Roy Trumbull|
This tale tells of a ghost ship that sails up the Hudson. Some say it is Henry Hudson and his men headed to the Catskills for a carouse and others believe it to be the Flying Dutchman. Then there is the ship seen in the calm that presages a storm causing sailors to set their anchors or head for harbor. From the collection "Myths and Legends of Our Own Land" by Charles M. Skinner.
Keywords: Henry Hudson; Catskills; Flying Dutchman; ghost ship; storm ship; folklore
|The Corn Maidens - Roy Trumbull|
This is a Zuni folk tale about the corn maidens and their interaction with mortals.
Keywords: Indians; corn maidens; Zuni; folklore
|Lester and Earl Explain the Universe - Roy Trumbull|
Two rural sages tackle religion, abortion, eternal congressmen, and China. All this while cleaning their rifles. Creative Commons Copyright - some rights reserved
Keywords: religion; abortion; congress; China; Lester and Earl; humor; satire
|An Imperfect Conflagration by Ambrose Bierce - Roy Trumbull|
A father/son team have committed a burglary and are dividing the spoils when the father holds back a fancy music box and denies he has it. This causes the son to end their partnership. He accomplishes this with a handy hatchet which he later uses on his mother. An insurance policy is taken out on the house to enrich the son when he burns it down. The fire is also intended to dispose of his parents bodies...
Keywords: murder; arson; humor; Ambrose Bierce
|Cahoots by Carl Sandburg - Roy Trumbull|
Corruption happens but in Chicago it is an art form. Perhaps the stuffing of pockets might be handicapped by the wearing of mittens.
Keywords: Carl Sandburg; corruption; Cahoots; poetry
|Pap's Pinto by Frank Bird Linderman - Roy Trumbull|
Two hunters have had their pack horses run off. While sitting at their camp fire that night an old prospector joins them. He's tried horses for packing and after much grief came to appreciate burros. He tells the tale of his last pack horse, an ornery pinto.
Keywords: pack horses; hunters; prospectors; burros; buzzards; sudden storm; Frank Bird Linderman
|The Magic Ring - Roy Trumbull|
This story doesn't start out well. A young lad is sent to market to buy food and instead gets a dog and a cat. His mom kicks him out. He labors a year for a sack of sand. But then his fortunes turn for the better when he acquires a magic ring. Not willing to be happy with his lot he seeks the hand of a princess and then his troubles really begin. The text for this story may be found at www.gutenberg.org
Keywords: magic ring; king; princess; fairy tale; audio book
|The Child Samuel - First Samuel - Roy Trumbull|
This reading is from the first three chapters of First Samuel and tells the story of Samuel the child. One interesting thing to note is the use of "mine" where you would expect "my". "Mine" reminds us of the German parent of English and it is very natural for a child to say.
Keywords: bible; Samuel
|Hall of Mirrors by Fredric Brown - Roy Trumbull|
Do time machines work as we think they do? Or do they work in a way that is beyond our imagination? One man must find out again and again.
Keywords: time machine; Sci-Fi; audio book; Fredric Brown; time travel
|The Sprightly Tailor - Roy Trumbull|
The Sprightly Tailor comes from a collection of Celtic stories collected by Joseph Jacobs. It tells the tale of a tailor who has been commissioned by the Laird (Lord)Macdonald to make a fine pair of breeches called trews. To have a bit of fun at the expense of the tailor, a premium is to be paid if the tailor will sew the trews at night in the ruins of a haunted church.
Keywords: audio books; haunted; ghosts; monsters; trews; Sprightly Tailor; children's stories
|Joey and the Portal by Roy Trumbull copyright 2009 - Roy Trumbull|
Joey visits an MRI machine and learns something about how it images soft tissue. Joey's Uncle Walter has vanished and in his uncles lab he finds something like a home brew MRI machine but it's much different. He figures out it's a portal but to where?
Keywords: Joey; MRI; Sci-Fi; fantasy; audio book; Roy Trumbull
|Four Preludes On Playthings In The Wind - Roy Trumbull|
No matter the scope of man's accomplishments they soon revert to dust.
Keywords: Carl Sandburg; poetry; Great City; rats and lizards; golden girls
|Visit the Sins by Cory Doctorow - Roy Trumbull|
This story was first published in Asimov's Science Fiction in June 1999 and later appeared in Year's Best Science Fiction 5 - HarperPrism David G. Hartwell, editor. The story contains language that may be considered obscene. A technology is developed to supplant drug treatment of concentration disorders and to level out mood spikes and disruptive behavior. A chip is implanted in the brain that takes over body maintenance and preserves a semblance of social graces when the subject's attention lev...
Keywords: brain implant; therapy; mood disorders; vegetables; Doctorow; Sci-Fi; switched off; zero function
|The Church of the Cell Phone - Roy Trumbull|
When an object becomes the focus of personal devotion, can a church be far behind?
Keywords: Church of the Cell Phone; Brother Wooley; sermons; satire; humor